really screwed and a couple of nuts

January 6, 2010 § 25 Comments

Thanks sweet Marty for helping me jump-start one of the better parts of my cancer nightmare, my blog.

It wasn’t that I lacked for ideas.  It wasn’t that I just couldn’t write.

I’ve been in the hospital for over a week chasing debilitating pain and it’s kissin’ cousin the painkiller. Add to that a few hundred  “NO SHIT!” moments and any real writer would have blogs, books, calendars and possibly a screenplay under contract.

Not me. A week of all this pain and attention and not a line of copy to show for it.

I’ll be up front, lack of content was not the biggest culprit here.

It’s been a hot house of fantastic material;  A great staff, endless and wonderful visits from friends and family and just enough boxes of kleenex to cover the “aha”, “oh no” and “oy vey” moments.

I met Republicans in the Emergency Room who were afraid of affordable healthcare.

Learned that the cyber knife fitting involved making a mask  and I use to love making masks!

When a chat with friends turned to stool softeners, a perfect pair of BIDMC socks showed up courtesy of Hospital CEO Paul Levy.

I knew my stories would have to flow, but when?

The real problem, was that when I went to type, nothing looked like English. Here’s an example of an email I sent to a friend:

so gla dyou are with kil and had fun. Seems the irls had jsu as much fn! promise you must do this 2#  per year with forgive the typos – more about taht in pereson – nothing comes out riklt.
Was admitted tp the hositil this afternooon anf will stay through procudure  – hopefully leave riday.
marty is snooozing near me, frannie is with her anties and in auntie paradises and samw paime reliwf  has instilled my a good hekping og =opitimidim
too tired to wrtie more tomorroem xoxox

A number of days ago Marty sent around the email you will see below. That said, there may be very little here that is actually newsworthy to any of you. Call it plagiarism, I prefer creative collaboration. Marty was Copy Writer. I was the Art Director.

There’s more coming. I promise, but first a note  of deep thanks and gratitude for those who have sent love and prayers and food and flowers and wishes and warmth. In this dreadful situation you have been a blessing to me and my family.

Dear Friends,

Marilyn had a very rough night, perhaps 2 2-hour bouts of sleep, and the rest of the time unremitting pain and the impossible task of finding any kind of comfortable position. I spent much of the night rubbing her back.

Dr. Kasper the neurosurgeon came by and removed the dressing to reveal a long row sutures, but it feels better having the dressing off, which was pulling.

Marilyn said to Dr. Kasper that in addition to it hurting where the incision was,  that it also hurt on the top and sides of her head.  He said something like, “of course, we had to put your head in a vice like clamp and screw your head to the operating table with three screws to make sure that it did not move at all during the procedure”.

(Art Directors note: An image previously selected for comic relief and dramatic impact was pulled from this post, as it accomplished neither. )

Marilyn’s been seen by at least 4 MDs this AM, who seem to be taking the pain issue seriously, and will be switching her to patient controlled administration and letting her take more morphine than what she has currently been receiving, which has been inadequate.  They will try to get on top of the pain in the next few hours. Frannie brought in a monkey to act as surrogate for her sick mom. Marilyn attached the patient controlled administration device to the monkey .  Until they find a long lasting med Marilyn can tolerate, Marilyn has her morphine Monkey.

Momo is very much herself as the surgical procedure has left her sense of humor intact.

Marilyn is up for adult visits (no kids except Frannie). Probably best to call first to confirm.  She isn’t looking her best, may hopefully be sleeping though she hasn’t been comfortable enough yet.

Happy New Years all.

Love, Marty



§ 25 Responses to really screwed and a couple of nuts

  • stan bornstein says:


    I’ve been following all your and Marty’s postings and am glad to know you’ve had so many visits. My not being among them is probably a small gift to you as I a fear I would not be good company. So, instead, I invisibly visit you in my thoughts more often than you – even with your amazing imagination – could imagine. It’s a very strange role reversal that I look to your blog for bits of humor that you might have for me. I am uncharacteristically speechless. I often tell people “I’m a great listener; I just have a lot to say.” But I can’t find the words to express how you amaze me, how I wish we had (and still hope to have) the joys and difficulties of working together (I know it would be intensely funny and creative. Maybe we’d even be a enough money to support the venture). And I am envious of people who are so much closer to you because they have something very special. Just for the record, you still owe me, at the very least, a chocolate milk shake (that’s a years old promise you made to me). I fully expect you to pay up. In fact, I’d clear my whole calendar for you (but first I need to see if I can get some important meetings or something on it. Then I’ll clear it.) I seem to be using lots of parentheses in this note to you. I guess it’s because my thoughts here are like some sort of nesting doll, one inside the other like my thoughts about you and my wish to somehow help make you feel better.


  • Betsey says:

    Marilyn, my dear, this post illustrates your hutspa (sp?), perseverance, style and SPIRIT!!! Still sending positive energy prayers and vibes you way!

    Sending love too!


  • Love and kisses, Momo. We’re sending love to you from all of us. Reb

  • gail says:

    here is where I say …. you’re beautiful on the inside, too
    and what about that monkey on your back?

    You’d think they would use little stitches-don’t cha think?
    What! They gotta’ show off their skill
    Doesn’t look too delicate to me~~~~~~~

    Welcome home…..soon

  • Carolyn Ross says:

    OK, Where are you and what would you like me to bring and when.
    You keep up your amazing work there!

  • Ruth says:

    momo – Sending hugs, massages, love and prayers (and a few laughs) your way from NYC… person soon. So grateful to be getting your and Marty’s updates – what a dynamic artistic duo! You are both extra ordinary! xoxo ruth

  • seth says:

    wow. i love you momo. and i love your new monkey. we are all sending you love from northern california. jasob has a great joke about a pirate with a peg leg that ill record and send you. xoxo. -seth

  • Andrea says:

    When you get out of there, perhaps your monkey could play with my elephant?
    I’m thinking of you every day and sending well wishes via the spirits that be… much strength, humor and love-Andrea xo

  • susie says:

    Sending love and courage to you, Marilyn. I like reading the comments on your blog because it reminds me of how many great spirits you have around you, in addition to the ones I know. Go away pain!!

  • Jette says:

    Hey Woman! I think of you every day – while sending extra positive vibes your direction…you are an inspiration! Love to you and all those around you.

  • Nancy says:

    The worst is over. I investigated the gamma knife years ago and it is a terrific technology. When I first heard of it only one hospital in Philly had it.
    Today it is so precise. Again we wish you a speedy recovery.

  • Eileen says:

    I’m praying and meditating positive energy to you everyday. I admire your courage and spirit through all this… and your sense of humor and talent for writing is taking me back to our production days…. I miss you.

  • susan crain says:

    Hello Marylin,

    I have been thinking of you and wondering why I had not seen you recently at the health club.Then I was speaking with Karen earlier and she tolsd me she had received this blog. Your blogs are incredible and such a gift to all that know you. I would love to come and see you in the hospital if you feel up to it. I will be in Boston Friday afternoon , ofcourse getting a work out in at the club and then meeting one of my sister’s son’s for lunch. let me know if you think an afternooon visit would work.

    Much love , Susan

  • My thoughts continue to be with you and yours. Thanks so much for sharing yourself so openly. You are an amazing woman, and I’m proud to know you (even if only slightly).

    Much love ….

  • shula kantor says:

    My thoughts are with you..Keep fighting Shula

  • suzy says:

    I feel so far away, but I’m pulling for you and hoping that the cyber knife does it’s job and cuts the pain real soon. Love from me, Rose and Stanley. We say a special prayer for you every night.

  • Lizzy says:

    (Art Directors note: An image previously selected for comic relief and dramatic impact was pulled from this post, as it accomplished neither. )

    oh my god – you weren’t going to…were you? Comic relief??? Dramatic Impact maybe.

    Another reason to cheer:

    you are still pushing that creative envelope but continue to be your own best editor. The momo machine chugs on…


  • Nancy says:

    Technology really has come so far since my first visit at the Brain Tumor Society’s national conference in Boston so many years ago. Boston has the cyber knife and the Gamma knife. I was reading about the procedures and so many people say it is painless. This should be a welcome relief after the pain you are experiencing now. Surgery is the toughest and as the wound heals it hurts like hell.

    You are very strong and have many friends and family who are cheering you on to health. It will get better. All it takes is tincture of time.

  • Erica says:

    Very thankful for the update…have been thinking about you sending lots of love and light! xoxo E

  • Marci Bloch says:


    Your blog is priceless. Thanks for the update. I am thinking about YOU everyday.

  • June says:


    Thank you for letting me know about you and the humor. I feel very bad about all your suffering. I hope you have a really strong painkiller by now. Sending you much love and I hope you will feel better soon.

    xoxo June

  • kathy dann says:

    i had no idea you were going through all of this- my thoughts and prayers are with you, your daughter and family. thanks for keeping us updated with your progress- i so admire your humor through all of it. you are truly inspirational. (and somehow you manage to always look stylish)

  • Great Blog Would love to feature it on,

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    I’ve found your blog through a few of our mutual online affiliates and would love to work with you as well. I have interest in being included within your blog roll and would love to explore possibilities. Thank you for your time, I look forward to your response.


    Ryan Flaherty, Editor,
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  • Denny says:


    I stumbled onto your blog through the Lisbon 2010 speaker lineup. As a fellow survivor (in remission since 07), I’m totally there with you. Sending good thoughts and know that one day soon that laughter will shine bright again! The pictures you posted are absolutely moving and beautiful.

    Much love and cheering you on,


  • Karen VIgurs- Stack says:

    Pain Pain go away! Momo must get on with her day! This is my daily chant for you, my friend.

    Despite it all, somehow your blog captures your effervescent spirit, your courageous humor, your lightness of being.

    I will call again to come see your ugly stitches and beautiful face.

    Shine on,

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